Other people define me now, i no longer define myself... It took me quite some time to see it, but i see that i have been living with the doubts and views of other people, i ask them what i am, they tell me something that tears me down so bad it rips me apart, and all that is left is the dust that sets like a cold sigh. I take a deep breath, and the air just fills my lungs heavily, even though i am no where close to old, i already feel so heavy and tired. Things that i used to do everyday, my habits , me, i have change. I'm to lazy, to tired to move, to do anything!
Everyday drags me like a rag doll, flinging me in different directions again and again, like how a dog would do to a toy. Then, i just get dump, cold , alone, nobody cares, if i rot, if i don't, i'm just somebody else. I tell you everything, but do you know that? Do you know what it feels like? Cut every single day, sliced, diced, left there all alone?! I care so much, but you don't even give a .... I'm trying to forget, i want to forget, everything i had, cause everything i gained just ended up creating a bigger loss then what i fought for. My friends, i call them my friends, do they consider me one? Huh? Do they hate me, do they dislike me for who i am, i know i'm not the nicest person, they easiest person to relate to, but at least, please, let me know i have someone to count on, someone i know at least that loves me..
Maybe leaving isn't such a bad idea after all.. i don't think i have the strength to move on.. depression is crushing me ... i can't take it anymore!!!!! Help me..
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